Chapter (অধ্যায়): EPISTLES PAGE-337Page: 337 of 519
America, and go back. The more people come to these countries, the better. But then it sets my nerves on edge to look at those who don hats and pose as Sahibs !
Black as chimney sweeps, and calling themselves Europeans! Why not wear one's country-dress, as befits gentlemen?-Instead of that, to add to that frightfulness of appearance! Good heavens! . . . Here, as in our country one has to spend from one's own pocket to give lectures, but one can make good the expenses if one lives long enough and makes a reputation. Another thing, my incessant lecturing tours are making my constitution very nervous, causing insomnia and other troubles. Over and above that, I have to work single-handed. It is no use depending on my countrymen. No one (in Bengal) has hitherto helped me with a penny, nor has a single soul stepped forward to my assistance. Everybody in this world seeks help, and the more you help him, the more he wants. And if you can do no further, he will call you a cheat. . . . I love ___ and trust him. . . . He will be free from disease through the Lord's grace. I take all his responsibility. . . .
Yours affectionately,
Vivekananda
LXXVII
C/o E. T. Sturdy, Esq.,
High View, Caversham, England
1895
{original in Bengali}
Dear Shashi {Ramakrishnananda},
. . . I am in receipt of Rakhal's letter today. I am sorry to hear that __ has suffered from gravel. Most probably it was due to indigestion. Gopal's debts have been cleared; now ask him to join the monastic order. The worldly-wise instinct is most difficult to root out. . . . Let him come and work in the Math. One is apt to imbibe