Chapter (অধ্যায়): EPISTLES PAGE-432Page: 432 of 519
voice thrilling my soul. Bonds are breaking-love dying, work becoming tasteless-the glamour is off life. Only the voice of the Master calling.-"I come Lord, I come." "Let the dead bury the dead, follow thou Me."-"I come, my beloved Lord, I come."
Yes, I come. Nirvana is before me. I feel it at times-the same infinite ocean of peace, without a ripple, a breath.
I am glad I was born, glad I suffered so, glad I did make big blunders, glad to enter peace. I leave none bound, I take no bonds. Whether this body will fall and release me or I enter into freedom in the body, the old man is gone, gone for ever, never to come back again! The guide, the Guru, the leader, the teacher has passed away; the boy, the student, the servant is left behind.
You understand why I do not want to meddle with A__. Who am I to meddle with anyone, Joe? I have long given up my place as a leader-I have no right to raise my voice. Since the beginning of this year I have not dictated anything in India. You know that. Many thanks for what you and Mrs. Bull have been to me in the past. All blessings follow you ever! The sweetest moments of my life have been when I was drifting: I am drifting again-with the bright warm sun ahead and masses of vegetation around-and in the heat everything is so still, so calm-and I am drifting languidly-in the warm heart of the river! I dare not make a splash with my hands or feet-for fear of breaking the marvellous stillness, stillness that makes you feel sure it is an illusion!
Behind my work was ambition, behind my love was personality, behind my purity was fear, behind my guidance the thirst of power! Now they are vanishing, and I drift. I come! Mother, I come! In Thy warm bosom, floating wheresoever Thou takest me, in the voiceless, in the strange, in the wonderland, I come-a spectator, no more an actor.